a. To people who read my weblog columns and get the humour. And laugh.
b. To people who read the columns and do not get them and then grumble. This gives me an opportunity for laughter.
c. To people who still talk to me.
d. To people who have cut me dead.
e. To people who read my material in hopes that I will get better at writing. If it is any consolation to you, I hope I will get better as well. If there was a spell-Check for thoughts I might have a chance.
f. To the people who make Facebook as crassly stupid as it is. They do not raise any faith in mankind, but they let me feel superior to something. Not quite as good as canned chili but better than a suggested post.
g. To people who do not tailgate me at dusk when I am in an unfamiliar neighbourhood. May your tyres always maintain pressure and your seatbelt never pinch.
h. To people who keep appointments.
i. To people who help me with technical enquiries – but only if they are right.
j. To people who speak loudly enough to be heard and slowly enough to be understood.
k. To people who do not bring takeaway containers of coffee out and sip while we are in conversation.
l. To waiters and waitresses who do not hover. If I want another beer I’ll call for it; if I want a helicopter I’ll call Sikorski.
m. To book store owners who put good things on remainders tables at low prices.