” Who Ordered The Load Of Horse Crap? “

Over here. Back up the wagon. Let her go right here…we’re establishing a university.

Not, you understand, an institution of higher learning that does research, advances thought, conducts examinations, and grants meaningful certificates to indicate study. No. we’re going to have a university of pretend achievement to reward people for paying us money.

What? You look shocked. We’re only doing what any number of sports organisations, artistic pseuds, or commercial urgers are doing. We’re using a revered word to boost up our chances of those fees. Hey, it’s a more legal approach than pistols and bandannas on the railroad.

Okay, it’s a little overdone, considering the Universities Of Whatever that amount only to commercial advertisement or self-congratulation, but look on the bright side – we don’t have sex scandals in revered colleges like the Poms do or money scandals like the Yanks. If we clap the carpet bag closed and run for the steamboat occasionally, it’s just business.

You wanna Doctorate or just a diploma? Got both here…

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