The New Government Recipe

Good news. You can now eat high on the hog with a new sauce.

It still comes from the same old pork barrel, but this time there is a new Prime Minister and set of cronies dishing it out. As some of them are less inclined to polite behaviour than the parties they have supplanted, the flavour of the money soup should be all that much greasier and salted with ruder language.

Of course the average consumer will not get a choice cut, unless they are in a marginal seat or an old-guard true believer. The cooks know who their loyal supporters are, and they are the ones with the best chance. But the time to get in and chew hard is now, before the new PM or one of his ministers is caught with the ———— by the press? You may fill in the blank yourself but remember that Liberals traditionally get caught out with a sex scandal and Labour falls afoul of something to do with money.

It is also a good idea to get your hands into the candy jar as early as possible before the new PM announces that all the election promises are impossible due to unexpected discoveries about the previous administration. Of course it will not be all his fault at all…citizens will have the comfort of seeing him cry salt tears of disappointment. In the Northern Territory it will be salt water crocodile tears.

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