We Need A Traditional Enemy

Our country needs a new traditional enemy, and we need one now.

Like the rest of the world we are facing health issues and economic woes and natural disasters. As well, we have commercial television to cope with. We need something to unite us as a nation; we need a new traditional enemy.

And we need not have a real one… someone who mounts the occasional raid, stealing and burning as they go…we don’t want to risk them actually becoming our new overlords. We want someone we can hate from a distance.

It used to be that we could despise the English, when they condemned us to lives of penal servitude on a bare continent. That was a long time ago, and we have made the place look pretty good. And we are generally more comfortable in our little lives than ever we might have been in the UK. We’ve lost a lot of impetus to throw rocks at them.

Likewise for North America – they actually function as a place we can feel superior to in many respects…while still sheltering under the umbrella of what their military can do to the local enemies. Like the Canadians, we can diss them in safety from the student coffee shop, but then go quiet when we get ourselves into trouble. I’ll correct that…when the UK gets us into trouble.

We used to be able to regard the various occupants of the Orient as horrid enemies until they moved into the suburbs and proved to be good for the place. It’s hard to see people as aliens when they are in the local IGA stacking the shelves or next door gardening.

Are the Germans still enemies? Well, no. Nor are the Japanese. Even the Russians are a long way away and likely to be quarrelling amongst themselves anyway.

Ideally we want an enemy that we can yell at, but with a language barrier so that both sides could let themselves boil over without any comprehension. I think we’d be most comfortable with a South American one, as they could respond in Spanish or Portuguese. After the yelling match we could all go down the pub.

PS: Or we could have North Korea. They would tick most of the boxes on the card. And their ageing generals wearing the pants covered in medals are sillier looking than ours.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this:
search previous next tag category expand menu location phone mail time cart zoom edit close