Offensive Tweet

Actually it was more of a blurp. And then a series of blapping sounds. The final squelch was a surprise to all of us.

In my defence, the Wednesday after Taco Tuesday is always something of a fraught time. As it followed on after Bean Sunday and Macaroni Monday I suppose we were dealing with something of an inevitability.

Most of the damage has been repaired, insofar as one can salvage fabrics. The house is thoroughly aired and I think is better for it. There are no more cockroaches and silverfish inside. The cat is respectful, if wary. The neighbours have a For Sale sign on their lawn, and we’ve found that Silvo removes the tarnish from the knives and forks.

I wonder if there is any culture on Earth that regards this as socially polite – as some do slurping noodles or belching after dinner. A compliment to the cook, perhaps…delayed, as it were.

I shall apply for the astronaut program. If they cannot hear me scream in space, none of the other sounds should be of concern.

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