Address The Magistrate

You have been brought here to answer some questions about your knowledge of the recent allegations. Stand up straight and speak plainly.

” Yes, Your Honour .”

Have you ever met the accused or the accuser?

” No, Your Honour. “

When did you become aware of the allegations?

” When I heard them on the radio, Your Honour. “

You may dispense with the full honorific until we are finished here. Substitute ” sir “. The court reporter’s fingers are getting tired. You say you have no personal experience whatsoever, either participating in or observing the incidents that comprise the allegations? You were not there at any time?

” No, Sir . “

Then why do you persist in placing comments in the pages of social media damning the accused?

” Well, everyone else does and… “

You do realise how foolish that makes you appear, do you not? You do understand that if you have no more than an opinion that cannot stand the simplest legal questioning and that is based upon the merest electronic hearsay, that you are playing a false part in a subject that requires care and probity, do you not? That your habit of attaching political preference or gender bias to a real case in real time can do real harm to any sensible enquiry. You do understand that?

” Umm, well, err…”

Do you understand it now?

” Yes, Your Honour. Sir. “

You are dismissed.

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