Adjusting For The Facebook Tangent – Or How To Operate the BGA Bomb Sight

Also known as high-altitude precision trollery.

Facebook people are tech-savvy. They are street-smart. They are hip, hep, and hopeful. They post the most appallingly foolish things with a view to being considered brilliant people. Or good people.  Or just people… Sometimes they succeed and sometimes they fail, but they are always there  – ready to supply the keen Guild member with a word, phrase, or vacuous thought. And these can be weaponised instantly.

When someone posts a Facebook cry for help, respond immediately. You can offer solace, understanding, and kindness…or you can jeer at them – just do not ignore it. If you do so , they will repeat the process. Either stroke them or strike them, but do it quickly.

If someone does a laughable typographical error – some inadvertent key strike that makes whatever they wrote look bad – you must instantly respond as if it was pure philosophy or gospel truth. It doesn’t matter whether you agree or disagree – just get in there and take it seriously. 99 times out of 100 they will start to defend their position before they realise that they have typed ” anal sex ” instead of ” social justice “. Your notice of it will cause it to be seen by far more people and then the shit fight will start. Withdraw out of splash range, get some popcorn and a big orange drink, and enjoy the show.

If someone is a genuinely nice person it is considered a little low to attack them on Facebook or other social sites. But we must also remember that Chubby Checker in ’62 asked how lowwww we can go, and that was before the internet. He’d be surprised now.

But what must we do if we wish to help – to support someone else’s opinion – to advance a cause we feel deeply about – to be good people and responsible citizens? How can we be actually, as well as virtually, virtuous?

Hello?

Is this on?

Am I addressing a meeting of the Backstabbers Guild Of Australia?

Hello?

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