The Pension Hour

Cottesloe car 23

Let me make myself clear – I do not receive a pension from the government for any reason. All my money is my own – when it is gone I will go as well, and will not be burdening the parish. The pension hour I refer to should more properly be called Senior Time. It extends from 10:03 AM until 2:21 PM each day. It is the time when the non-working population sets out to travel the roads of Perth.

The morning and afternoon rush hours are old folks hell. Even worse is the dusk when falling light levels and failing eyesight combine to make the young angry and the old dangerous. I have learned to avoid the road at this time. As for dawn, we actually do well then – we get up early to pee and are reasonably alert and not too savage at that time of the day.

But the real Senior Time is after the rush dies down. We can pilot our big overblown trophy cars or small underpowered sedans around to the shops without getting bowled over. The speed limit is the order of the day. We may run into your door in the mall parking lot, but it will be at a slow speed and we will make sure that we leave a note.

It is surprising to see the Seniors Hour drivers piloting some of the most expensive iron around. BMW’s, Mercedes, even the occasional Rolls or Bentley. Of course some of them will be Asian drivers with Asian number plates ( Today’s best was BUYORSELL…) and if they are ladies wearing big sun hats and white shoulder-length gloves, you can draw your own conclusions and dive for the median strip just as you please. I did see a peak sight a few days ago. The lady was togged in the big Scarlet O’Hara hat and the long opera gloves, but also had full anti-flash hood on under the hat. Either she was going to the mosque or to serve on a destroyer’s gun mount…

I suspect there are a lot of senior truck and bus drivers, too. You cannot really tell someone’s age if they are swaddled in a Hi-Vis vest or a transport uniform. I welcome the fact, as they can be more helpful and patient when one is riding or driving alongside them. And they are less likely to be nattering away on a cell phone or searching for Pokemon.


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