Oyez. Oyez. The Court Of Internet Is Now In Session. Draw Nigh And Give Heed.



Nearly everything that we see and do is now either repeated or commented upon on the internet – not by experts, but by internet writers. Like the person who typed this blog post. They may never have had a connection with the occurrence or action but that does not stop them from passing judgement – and thereby deriving some benefit.

The event might be the arrest of a teenager in America for bringing a clock to school. The bare facts will be overlain with dozens of opinions – and good or ill will be seen in all the acts of anyone surrounding the event, Political gain will attempt to be made – by all portions of the political spectrum – and commercial gain will attempt to be made buy anyone who can think up a semi-pausible hook of their product to the news story.

There will be extensive use of the “meanwhile” tool to publicise other causes and agendas by people who cannot think up a connection – they will use the reflected glow of either glory or gasoline fires to get attention.

Judgements will be made, and pronouncements pronounced. Friends will be right and enemies will be wrong, and Facebook will resound with smarmy comments for a month.

Cynics like me will see a conspiracy to provoke some sort of outrage that might pay off in a civil action. Cynics will also see political points being scored and academic papers being written. We will also wait for the clock in question to be:

a. Sold on eBay for a fabulous amount.

b. Copied in China and sold in the supplement section of Sunday papers at hefty subscription costs by some firm that refers to itself as a ‘Mint’.

c. Lost.

It will cost someone their job and make someone else theirs, and the kid in question will go onto national television and the audience will yell “Wooooooo” a number of times in the broadcast.

My benefit has been a bonus blog post topic for a slow Sunday night. If we can persuade a four-year-old to take two Talos guided missiles on a cruiser mount strapped to a coaster wagon into his local grade school playground and pose for the network news, we can all retire.

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